Bedrest when you are pregnant with your first child is bad enough. It's boring and time seems to stand still and you feel useless. But what do you do when your doctor orders you to rest when you have other little ones running around your house?

First, don't panic. This has happened to me and I've found several things that really helped pass the time without both of us going crazy!

1. Ask for help

Do you belong to a church? A moms group? Do you have family members nearby? Ask them for help. Friends have helped me clean my home while church members brought hit, home cooked meals in the evenings.

2. Netflix

I know, I know. Children shouldn't watch excessive amounts of television. Here's the thing, though. Sometimes you find yourself in a situation where it's imperative that you lay down and your kid needs something to do. Turn on some Daniel Tiger and rest. I promise it won't make you a bad mom.

3. Play outside

We're lucky enough to live in Jackdonville, Florida where we can expect sixty degree weather in the winter most days. I also have a fenced yard with a back patio. I let my son run around while I sit down and rest. It's hours of entertainment and they'll sleep great later!

3. Arts and crafts

Have your partner or friend help you set up gallon ziplocks with activities for your children. Take one out, set them at the table and rest while they explore and create. Sensory bags are great as well!

5. Preschool

If you have the means to do so, having your child spend a few days at preschool can be amazing for both of you. You aren't dealing with the stress of caring for them while trying to care for your little baby and they aren't cooped up! They get to play with other children and learn and will come home happy to see mommy!

My last post discussed why a doula charges so much. It can be confusing for some people to figure out how a doula sets her fee. Now that we have all of that sorted out, lets talk about the new problem: how in the world can you afford a doula if money is tight? There are thankfully several ways to pay for the cost of a doula if it is not necessarily in your budget!




1. Ask your insurance company if a doula is covered!
There are multiple insurance companies that are now reimbursing for doula services! This varies by plan and company so check with your provider before any other option is explored!

2. Use your FSA or HSA
Anyone with a FSA or HSA should look into being able to use the funds available for paying your doula costs. Many of them offer this option. 

3. Add doula services to your shower registry.
We add so many things we may never even use to our registries (how many of us end up giving away extra baby clothes??) Instead of letting people guess what you need, add doula services to your registry! Someone may just end up seeing this need and helping you take care of it!

4. Ask if your doula offers gift certificates. If so, tell your friends and family!
Always ask your doula if she accepts gift certificates! For the record, I do! All your family members need to do is contact your doula via her website and purchase the certificate. You would just need to bring the certificate to a prenatal meeting to redeem it for services.

5. Find out if your doula offers payment plans.
Most doulas understand that not everyone can just drop 600.00 in one sitting. I certainly do. Ask your doula about a payment plan. I, for example, am happy to sit with a couple and outline when they expect to make their payments. we just include it in your contract. As long as payments are made before I go on call at 38 weeks, then you're all set to go!

6. Barter!
Are you a photographer? Do you knit or make clothes? Are you a painter? Any skill you have at all can end up being your method of payment for a doula! I personally have bartered birth doula services in exchange for family photography sessions! It is a win-win situation for everyone!

7. Cut out non-essential spending (e.g. going out to eat) and save over time.
If you have exhausted all other resources and those are not options, one thing that will almost work is to put yourself on a budget. I find if something is very important to me, I make it a priority over things like new clothes, eating out, movie dates, etc. 

I hope this list helps reassure you that while doulas can be difficult for some families to afford, it is possible! Just be honest with your doula, and seek out help where you can!

Have you ever asked yourself, “why do doulas charge so much? I really want one and I know they're important, but I can't justify the cost!” 

Today I am going to break down the answer to your question! I will use my own fees and personal expenses as an example to illustrate what work is performed and how much of my own money is put into your support. For the example, I will use my "Birth Doula Support" package. It can be seen that the "C-Section Birth Support" package is set at the same fee. This is because while I spend less time at your birth, I spend more time with you during postpartum visits. 

Birth Support Package:

• Initial Consultation (Average 2 hours)
  
• Two Prenatal Meetings (Average 4 hours)
  
• One Provider Meeting (Average 2 hours)
  
• Assistance Creating Birth Plan (Average 2 hours)
  
• Phone/email Support during business hours (Average 5 hours)
  
• 24/7 on-call Availability from 38-42 Weeks: I cannot put an average time on this. Simply put, at this time I am unable to travel, drink alcohol, or make firm commitments of any kind. I must available to come to you at a moments notice.
  
• Continuous Labor Support (Average 14 hours)
  
• Immediate Post-birth Assistance (Average 2 hours)
  
• One Postpartum Meeting (Average 2 hours)
  


Personal Costs:

• Travel Time: Average of 25 miles one way for five trips ( 7 Hours)
  
• Gas Costs: (calculated using this MPG calculator, based on 25 miles one way for five trips: $50.00)
  
• Childcare: Average five trips (based on $20.00 per session: $100.00)
  
• Food: (based on an average of one meal while at your birth: $10.00)
  
• Hospital Parking: (average of $5.00)
  
• Materials for client (average of $20.00)
  
• PayPal fees: 2-3% ($12.00) 
  

Total Time/Money Spent:

When we add all of the time and money spent during my contract, we get these grand totals for the average birth:

Time: 46 hours
Money Spent: $197.00

So now based on my fee of $600.00, lets see how much I make per hour before taxes:

Current total fee for Birth Support Client: 600.00
Expenses: $197.00
Remainder: $403.00
Pay rate: $8.76 per hour before any self employment or income taxes are deducted.

So when you see a doula charging a fee you feel is too high, remember this breakdown. You are really paying for a priceless service! And I doubt anyone would ask a midwife or doctor to discount or waive their fee!

As a doula, I love what I do. I love my clients. I love being invited to participate in such an amazing moment in their lives. However, I also work very long hours, put forth a lot energy, and spend my families money in order to meet my clients needs. Doulas definitely deserve to be paid, at the very least, minimum wage for what they're doing for your family.

On Suze Ormon's show, a caller asked Suze if she could afford a doula. She ends with the conclusion that a doula is NEED and not a WANT! You can view the clip here.


Next week, join me in discussing the various ways to afford a doula if finances are tight!